How to “Indirectly” Open Girls You Want to Talk to…
I’m going to break down the advantages and disadvantages of opening indirectly.
First what is an “indirect opener”?
An indirect opener is an opener that does NOT explicitly convey interest in meeting the girl or group of people you are talking with.
This could range from something as innocuous as asking for the time or directions, to some of your longer, more usual PUA routines.
What are the advantages of opening indirectly?
The biggest advantage of opening indirectly is that you don’t trigger people’s AUTOPILOT responses to being approached.
Some girls are simply not particularly open to meeting new guys, and if you approach them directly they may blow you off.
However, by opening indirectly you can buy yourself an extra few minutes of time to convey your personality and demonstrate value.
Another advantage of opening indirectly, is that indirect openers are generally more interesting than direct openers.
Most indirect openers have at least 30 seconds of built in conversation.
This can be GREAT for beginners who have not yet developed their conversational repertoire.
The last advantage to opening indirectly is that it allows you to control the contingencies.
When you go out and run the same indirect opener over and over, you’ll notice that the same topics come up over and over again.
After awhile it can even seem like you’re able to PREDICT what the girls are going to say.
This can help you focus on your body language, the group dynamic, your spacial relevance, etc…
So what are the disadvantages of opening indirectly?
The first disadvantage of opening indirectly is that you don’t build any attraction with your opener.
There are some exceptions but for the most part an indirect opener is “neutral.”
You still have to do a lot of work to build attraction.
The second disadvantage of opening indirectly, is that you have to transition into a normal conversation.
Because you opened with an indirect opener, once you’re done with the opener you have to get into a normal conversation.
(Here’s my blueprint on opening and transitioning)
Otherwise you risk stalling out or coming off as “incongruent” since you stopped to ask them a specific question and then stuck around.
Now let’s move on to the CATEGORIES of indirect openers:
“Opinion Openers”: Opinion openers are the easiest way to open.
They have a very specific structure.
Let’s take a look at the structure using the classic Jealous Girlfriend opener by Style.
You first use a HOOK Question: The hook question is designed to get their attention and hook them into a conversation.
I.e. “Would you guys ever date someone who was still friends with their ex-girlfriend?”
The girls answer This part is important because you need the illusion of a two way conversation even when the contingencies aren’t going to change.
Remember no matter what the girls say here, it doesn’t affect what you’re going to do next.
Tease their answer and the reason you’re asking: Teases are important with opinion openers because you’re trying to play the role of “fun social, high value guy.”
“Ok mental note do not date this girl, but the reason I’m asking is because my friend (give a friend’s name) didn’t come out tonight because his girlfriend found a box of pictures and letters from his ex-girlfriend and totally freaked out! She told him he has to stop talking to her and burn the box. Is that like a normal (this city) girl response?”
Move forward into a normal conversation. Just know that you SHOULD not have a 20 minute conversation about jealous girlfriends…
Here’s my favorite openers and how to transition into conversation easily
Alright the second category of indirect openers are OBSERVATIONAL openers.
An “observational opener” involves making an observation about the girl or group.
Here’s one of my favorites, this is called the “I point out the obvious” openers.
Me: ” You’re wearing a vest!
Me: “I point out the obvious it’s kinda my thing, so who are you?”
It’s that simple.
The last category of indirect openers I want to address are “Humorous High Value Openers.” These are any openers that are so over the top that only a high value guy would have the balls to use them.
An examples of this is one of my favorite openers created by myself and The Don.
“The Child Support Opener.”
“Hey guys, I have a REALLY important question. I have three child support payments due this week and I can only afford to pay one of them. Cause I like to go to the track.
Here’s the thing though I don’t want to pay my ex wife cause she’s a cunt. And the second girl is the mother of the third so if I pay one I have to pay the other. Plus my bastard kids don’t appreciate shit.”
The downside of all of these openers is that they can result in blowouts if people don’t get the joke. These are an example of high risk/high reward openers, and are not generally recommended for beginners.