Have you ever stared at a disgustingly HOT chick, only to become disappointed?
It’s not her rock-hard nipples peeking through her top that disappoint you. Nor the shine coming off her perfect legs. And her round hips and butt? Yeah, those aren’t the problem either.
Your disappointment comes from the UPHILL climb you dread. You start to think about just how HARD it will be to get her in the sack. To see what’s underneath those tight clothes.
And then what? You GIVE UP before you even started. You won’t even stare at her anymore. Because you know you CAN’T have her.
To make things worse, some other douchebag comes along. Strikes up a quick convo with her. And then something odd happens that totally PISSES you off. She leaves with him!
How the hell did he do it? Did he spray some magic dust in her face? Hypnotize her with his eyes? Who knows? But you could get the same effect with just this…..
A friend of mine wanted to talk to a girl at the dog park…
He walked his dog there all the time, and whenever he did, he’d see her…
She’d always give him this cute smile, play with her hair nervously, or tell him his dog was adorable, then she’d walk on..
He wanted to talk to her EVERY time…
But never once had the nerve…
He’d brainwashed himself into thinking something easy was actually really “difficult”…
So he asked me how he could do it.
I told him a few things he could say…
He could have said something cheekily like “You again?”
Or even laughed and playfully said “What about me?” when she told him his dog was adorable…
Or he could have just said “Wait a sec” and talked to her about ANYTHING…
But what I quickly realized after giving him these lines was that his big fear was that he didn’t actually know what to do AFTER he broke the ice…
How could he keep it going? How could he get her number? How to make sure she remembered him when he texted her later?
Now, here’s the thing…
Meeting women at the park, the store, or even at work isn’t impossible…
In fact, is actually a lot easier than you think, however, it requires having three specific things
1. a clear beginning to the conversation
2. a clear middle
3. a clear way to end the conversation
If not, your mind will resist starting the conversation because our mind resists doing things where there is a high level of uncertainty…
Four characteristics of Natural Attraction are:
– Being Interesting
– Being Masculine
– Being Fun
– Being Confident
Today I want to zoom in specifically on the idea of being FUN.
Fun is the “ultimate attraction switch” isthat overrides everything else.
If talking to you is the most fun option for the girl, she’s going to keep doing it, even if it means ignoring her friends, the dance floor, etc…
Fun is fully definable.
Fun is a surplus of positive emotions. The more good emotions you make a woman feel, the more fun you are. Simple as that.
But this doesn’t mean you start acting like a “performing clown.”
(That’s what most guys do, and it doesn’t work. You just come off like your begging for laughs).
Here’s what you want to do:
Humor is one of the best tools for conveying fun. Whether or not you want to believe it, I have NEVER met a guy who was great with women who wasn’t at least a little bit funny.
If you want to get better results with women, you HAVE to be able to make them laugh consistently.
Another major tenet of fun is the idea of self-amusement.
Self-amusement is the ability to genuinely feel amused by what you’re doing, the jokes you’re telling, and the situations you’re in.
Get rejected? You see the funny side. Say a cocky line? It makes you grin.
This isn’t something you want to fake. It’s something you want to stem from a genuine enjoyment in your own life.
I simply cannot overestimate how much having fun helps with picking up girls!
Lots of guys get way too obsessed with demonstrating value and neglect making sure that they’re interactions with women are fun first for them and then for the woman they are speaking to!
P.S. If want to learn EXACTLY how to spark a fun, social conversation grab this
If you’re like most guys reading this, you probably think you’re pretty good in bed.
Maybe even better than average…
You can last long enough, you know some good “moves,” and girls usually tell you they liked it.
Yeah, you and every other guy…
But the truth is, over 80% of women admit to faking orgasms and LYING to men about how good the sex was.
So the odds are overwhelming… even if girls tell you the sex was good, most of them are BULLSHITING you!
Think that couldn’t happen to you? Then answer these questions honestly:
Think about the last girl you slept with…
Did she stick around and keep coming back for more?
Was she raving about you to her friends… daydreaming about you while she’s at work… eagerly initiating sex every single time she sees you?
Or did your relationship start to fizzle out after a while?
Maybe she faded out on you after a few dates?
Maybe she was telling you she’s busy, or “I’m just not ready for anything serious right now.”
Or maybe she didn’t even care to explain it and she just ghosted on you…
Her texts got shorter and shorter, until she just stopped getting back to you.
She forgot about you…
You just didn’t matter that much to her.
Look, if you’re anything like most guys reading this right now, this has happened to you at least once or twice, and it SUCKS.
So let me tell you what you NEED to hear, even if it hurts your ego.
The number one reason you lost that girl – or any other girl you really wanted – is because you didn’t give her an orgasm.
Even if you have a monster dong and you can last for hours, that’s not what really makes her addicted to you… (that’s just some BS you see in porn that doesn’t translate to real life)
To a woman, it’s not about your size, your “moves” or your stamina…
None of that matters unless you can penetrate her imagination.
That’s right, her most important “erogenous zone” isn’t anywhere on her body, it’s between her ears – her mind.
If you want to penetrate her as deeply as possible…
To the core, so she is totally filled up by you, and only you.
And she literally can’t stop herself from coming back for more..
Coming again and again and again…
So you OWN her… mind, body and soul…
Then you gotta be able to penetrate her mind.
You gotta know what to say, and how to “trigger” her sexual imagination.
Do it right, and she’ll get sexually addicted to you.
And I don’t mean that metaphorically, like “aw yeah dude, she’ll really enjoy sex with you now.”
I mean LITERALLY addicted… on a biochemical level.
She will feel physical “withdrawal symptoms” if she goes more than a day or two without feeling your dick inside of her.
And she will be starving for your cock every time she sees you.
Ready to make it happen?
Today I wanted to teach you a little bit about setting up dates the right way…
Guys tend to massively underrate the importance of dates. What they don’t realize is that the FASTEST way to get laid more is to become a better date.
But before you can become a better date, you have to learn to set up dates in a way that girls will ACTUALLY show up for them!
Every guy out there has been talking to a girl and said something like “We should hang out sometime, give me your number.”
While this better than nothing and can work when the girl is really into you, it’s still not a great way to set up a date.
Instead, what you want to do is have a set date that you ALWAYS invite girls out on.
That’s right, this is one of those places where “routines” can really help you.
Not only should you have a set date that you always invite girls on, you should also have a set story to introduce said date.
Here’s an example I used to use:
“Have you ever been to Cork? They have really cool wine tastings every Wednesday. My friends and I like to go there for every week. We always have a crazy time, plus they have really good tapas. And they give you free wine! It’s always one of the best days of the week!”
Here I’m overselling, but bear with me…
If you oversell the place without inviting her, it seems like the place is legitimately cool. If you oversell it while you’re inviting her, it looks like you’re trying too hard to IMPRESS her.
After you’ve “seeded” the idea of what you’re going to do, it’s time to invite her to come with you. There are two different schools of thought on how to invite the girl out.
There’s the old school “High Value” tactic of inviting a girl to “come tag along” with something you’re already doing. This should be used when you’re not sure if it’s really “on” or not with party girls.
Then there’s the idea of showing GENUINE interest in seeing her specifically again. That’s where you say something like “I really want to bring you with me next week.”
“I think it would be really fun for you to come with me.” This should be used when it seems like the girl is really into you or when the girl is a little more down to Earth.
Lastly you want to say something simple like “Ok give me your number and we’ll figure out driving and stuff.”
And Voila you have set up a date.
Now you just need to know what to do on the date.
P.S. That’s how you set up a solid date. But you want to make sure you’re doing this with a girl who doesn’t flake.
Today we’re going to be talking about Pre-Selection.
Pre-selection is the idea that women will be MORE attracted to you if they see you with other women… And it is huge for older guys.
The reason Pre-selection works is because of what’s called “thin slicing.”
As described by Malcolm Gladwell in the book “Blink”, thin slicing occurs when people make snap decisions about people, places and things.
When a woman sees you with other women she automatically thin slices that you are safe and attractive.
Because after all why would girls be hanging out with a guy who was creepy or unattractive?
This is huge for older guys because older guys often have more of that “creepy” hurdle to overcome, and it can often TANK their results.
There is no better way to overcome this hurdle than by genuine pre-selection.
Pre-selection can be displayed verbally by mentioning an ex-girlfriend casually in a story, or by talking about hooking up with a girl recently.
The more subtly you can do this, the better it works. You don’t want to force verbal pre-selection into a conversation or do it in an incongruent way.
Pre-selection can also be demonstrated by parading a girl around a bar or a club, or being surrounded by girls as you talk to them.
In other words, hang around with women. It’ll help.
P.S. If you’re an older guy, it can be hard enough getting women your own age let alone younger women.
Here’s a pretty deep female psych piece.
One of the things about my friends with sugar daddies and non-sugar-daddy girls, is the direct relationship between how the girl’s father showed affection and how the girl currently feels attraction.
Every girl I’ve ever met who was a “Gold-digger” had a weird relationship with their dads.
No great shock here, the only thing more obvious would be suggesting that all strippers have Daddy issues.
But the specific nature of the relationship, became more clear to me when I was talking to non-sugar-daddy girls.
Unlike most Gold-Diggers this one girl (I’ll call her Danielle) comes from a relatively poor family. Her dad lived across town from her, but only showed up every couple of months to take her out to eat or bring her a few presents.
Coincidentally,the way this girl feels someone likes her is when they buy/give her things.
Even if it’s something small like a drink or a pair of sandals at the beach.
The emotional distance, combined with him using material gifts instead of time, love, and guidance, produced a woman who is incapable at this point in her life of loving a man in the conventional terms.
She just doesn’t know how to do it.
I think most of the time in Dating people would explain gold digging as a “Survival” tactic.
Like when Mystery used to say that he would rather feed a girl a piece of food from his plate than buy her dinner, because of the evolutionary subtext.
While I think there’s a part of that which is true, I think more than nature, NURTURE is what creates our habits and emotions.
Nurture is why the purple Nike cult drank strychnine laced kool-aid and some even served it to their children.
Nurture is why terrorists drove a plane into the World Trade Center on September 11th.
And IMO nurture is responsible for gold-digging behavior.
I’m not a huge fan of Freud, but I do think he was on to something with his ideas about our mothers and fathers and the issues they create in how we process and feel loved.
The flip side of this is girls who get along really well with their dads.
These girls tend to be more self reliant, independent, and together.
They also tend to have too many dude friends, but that is a topic I covered in another email entitled “never trust a girl who doesn’t get along with other girls.”
Now, if you’re over 40, understand that you should never use money to attract a woman.
Today, we’re gonna be talking about something important.
Whenever you see a guy that most guys consider “alpha” or good with women, he’s probably considered this way because instead of investing in them, they’re investing in HIM.
This is the exact opposite of what 99% of relations between men and women are like. That’s why he stands out.
Today, we’re going to do a quick break down as to why, and explain the basics of Investment.
Investment is one of the most POWERFUL psychological factors at play when dealing with other people. You can read more about investment in Dr Robert Cialdini’s seminal book on Social Psychology “Influence.”
Investment for PICKUP will be defined as follows:
“A devoting, using, or giving of time, talent, or emotional energy by a woman for the purpose of interacting with you.”
In other words, she likes you so she spends a lot of effort to hang out with you.
Here’s a few easy ways to get women to invest in the interaction with you:
The more intimate of a level of detail about her life a woman reveals to you and accepts you revealing to her, the more invested she will be in the interaction.
This means prioritizing your genuine emotional connection is a really, really good idea.
2) Qualifying herself.
The more a girl works to explain herself to you and to win you over, the more invested she becomes.
The easiest way to do this is to have strong boundaries.
The more time a woman spends around you, the more invested she becomes.
This actually goes both ways.
If you can get a woman to buy you a cheap drink or pay for the cab back to your place, she will become more invested.
Don’t think you have to pay for everything. After all, why would you?
Investment is truly the link between getting attraction and making a woman feel compelled to see you again. So be sure to look for opportunities to increase it the next time you get attraction.
P.S. The level of investment you receive from women directly relates to your level of confidence.
This is because your confidence naturally makes you interact with women in the right non-needy way.